Blog Archives

Monday February 19, 2018: Joke Of The Day

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Friday February 16, 2018: Joke Of The Day

    A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, he said: “Now, students, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I

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Thursday February 15, 2018: Joke Of The Day

      Doug Pender lived all his life in the Florida Keys, and is on his deathbed, and knows the end is near. His nurse, his wife, his daughter and two sons, are with him.   He asks for two witnesses

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Wednesday February 14, 2018: Joke Of The Day

      An elderly couple are talking one the evening:   “Honey, I’m so sorry that I let out my anger at you so often. How do you manage to stay so calm with my foul moods?”   “I

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Tuesday February 13, 2018: Joke Of The Day

    “How is holy water made?”   “You Boil the hell out of it.”

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Monday February 12, 2018: Joke Of The Day

  The lion married off a child. Being the king of the jungle, he invited all the animals for the wedding. On the very special night, a mouse walks up the lion and says, “Congratulations brother!”   The lion looks

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Thursday February 8, 2018: Joke Of The Day

    Wishing to do the right thing, the motorist started out in search of the farmer whose rooster he had hit. “Pardon me”, said the motorist, ” I killed your rooster with my car and I’m willing to replace

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Wednesday February 7, 2018: Joke Of The Day

    Two antennas met on the roof, fell in love and got married.  The ceremony wasn’t much, but the reception was excellent.

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Tuesday February 6, 2018: Joke Of The Day

    Jim’s doctor tells him he only has one day to live. When Jim goes home, he shares the news with his wife.   She asks him what he wants to do with the little time he has left.

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Monday February 5, 2018: Joke Of The Day

    A woman in labour suddenly shouted “Shouldn’t! Wouldn’t! Couldn’t! Didn’t! Can’t!”  “Don’t worry”, said the doc, “those are just contractions”.  

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November 29, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

An elderly lady went into a butcher shop and asked for a fresh Bradford turkey. Joe the butcher brought out a fresh turkey and began to wrap it up but the lady peered down its throat and proclaimed “this is

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November 22, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

After a particularly poor game of Golf, a popular Golf member skipped the clubhouse and started to go home. As he was walking to his vehicle, a Policeman stopped him and asked. ” Did you tee off on the 16th

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November 21, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

A woman was letting her husband have it with just a touch more venom than usual, saying, “You’re an idiot. You have always been an idiot. You’ll always be an idiot. If they had an idiot contest, you’d come in

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November 20, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

A guy calls the hospital. He says, “You gotta send help! My wife’s going into labor!” The nurse says, “Calm down. Is this her first child?” He says, “No! This is her husband!” Photo courtesy of cliparting.com

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October 27, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

A duck, a skunk, and a deer went out for dinner at a local restaurant in Barrie one night. When it came time to pay, the skunk did not have a scent, the deer did not have a buck so they

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